6 Tips for Advising Women Donors

Elaine Martyn, Senior Vice President, Private Donor Group, Fidelity Charitable®

As women increasingly shape the future of philanthropy, advisors must evolve their approach to support this dynamic and influential group of donors. Women in the U.S. now control more than $10 trillion in assets—and that figure is expected to grow significantly in the coming decade. Yet traditional advising models often overlook how many women prefer to give through relationships, collaboration, and alignment with their deeply held values.

Recent findings from Fidelity Charitable’s Women and Giving Report underscore this difference. Women tend to be highly active in charitable giving, motivated by empathy and a desire to create lasting social change. Nearly 9 in 10 women say they wish they could do more, and they often integrate their giving into many aspects of daily life—from volunteering and donating goods to supporting socially responsible businesses.

Below are six tips to help philanthropic advisors engage women donors more thoughtfully and effectively.

Start with values, not vehicles
Women donors often enter philanthropy with a strong sense of purpose. Whether they are giving independently, with family, or through donor-advised funds or foundations, they are often seeking meaning, not just mechanics.
I’ve been fortunate to play a leadership role in designing and supporting my extended family giving. That experience—working across generations, and groups of cousins, aunts, granduncles, and more—has deepened my understanding of the unique dynamics, challenges, and values of each family. Even though giving is deeply personal to each person, this experience has sharpened my ability to relate to clients navigating similar roles and to support them as they step into their own values through their philanthropy.
Advisors can support this journey by creating space for reflection, asking:
- What motivates her to give?
- What change does she want to create or be a part of?
- How does she define success?
This values-centered approach fosters trust and opens the door to more strategic and joyful giving over time.
Understand the complexity of wealth and identity
Your client may be a first-generation wealth creator, an inheritor, or a partner in managing the family resources. She may carry complex feelings about privilege, visibility, or the responsibilities of wealth. Some clients are also managing caregiving responsibilities, career transitions, or family expectations—all of which shape how, when, and why they give. Effective advisors listen deeply, avoid assumptions, and understand how race, class, and lived experience intersect to shape a donor’s philanthropic identity.
Build a relational and collaborative advising style
Research consistently shows that women are more likely to give—and to give more—when they feel connected. Advisors should approach their role not as technical experts offering solutions but as trusted partners co-creating a philanthropic journey.
This may include:
- Facilitating peer learning groups or donor circles
- Introducing nonprofit leaders for authentic conversations
- Offering time and space for donors to reflect and learn
This relational style reflects how many women engage with philanthropy, prioritizing connection, collaboration, and community impact.
Simplify tools and processes
Many women donors express a desire to better understand the mechanics of effective giving—how to evaluate nonprofit partners, measure impact, or explore innovative models like impact investing. Yet some may not have the experience to navigate jargon-heavy or metrics-driven conversations.
I’ve personally chosen to be an impact investor in several women-led funds. It has been an empowering stepping stone to experiment with investments that I have then mirrored in my personal investing strategy. This experience has deepened my understanding of the questions, opportunities, and even hesitations clients may face when aligning their investments with their values, and it has helped me build my own confidence with risk-taking and legacy strategies. Sharing about these kinds of journeys—both my own and those of others—not only helps demystify the process but also allows me to connect more authentically with women donors and support them in feeling empowered to explore impact investing themselves.
Advisors can help by offering clear and accessible tools and frameworks, sharing examples from the field, and encouraging learning over perfection.
Engage in conversations about equity and power dynamics
Today’s philanthropic landscape increasingly demands conversations about equity—who holds power, how decisions are made, and what trust-based or community-led giving could look like. Many women donors are especially drawn to these conversations and are willing to consider their own role in systems of wealth and influence.
Advisors should be prepared to:
- Explore power dynamics within giving structures, families, and advisor-client relationships
- Share examples of participatory grantmaking and the shifting of decision-making power to frontline leaders
Celebrate leadership and impact
Women often give generously and boldly, yet behind the scenes. Advisors can help shine a light on their leadership, whether by sharing stories, highlighting lessons learned, or simply affirming the courage it takes to give with intention. Impact isn’t only about outcomes; it’s also about how a donor’s giving reflects who she is and the world she hopes to shape.

Advising women donors requires more than adjusting your language or offering a curated list of grantees. It requires a shift in posture—from transactional to relational, from prescriptive to participatory. When done well, advisors can support women donors step more fully into their leadership, voice, and vision for a better world.